Mac
October 27, 2008
The more I give to you… (0 Comments)
You have to excuse the emo posts from time to time. Ranting and venting to my friends hasn’t been enough actually. *lol* I have tons and tons of things to blog about, but I haven’t figured out where to start. So I have to properly plan that first including a bunch of other things. My days lately, although not really a mess, hasn’t really been productive.
This, though, I have been wanting to talk about.
The more I give to you, the more I die.
It’s a line from one of my favorite songs. (Guess what song that is! *lol*)
This line has a strong impact to me after going through a fucking disastrous relationship. When Mac and I started going out, I wasn’t sure if I would love him but I liked him a lot. I told myself I should stop playing around and be serious again (because the person I liked before took me for granted, but that’s a different topic). Eventually, I learned the feeling of loving him. I gave my love in various ways. He became my priority; part of my life decisions. Even when I was sick, I was there for him. I did things that years ago I didn’t expect I would do like being PDA with him. I didn’t like the idea, but I didn’t care what others think — I just wanted to hug and kiss him to show even strangers how much I loved him. When there was something he needed, I did everything I can to give it to him. It didn’t matter if my parents or friends would get mad. It didn’t matter if I become sick, tired, or poor. What mattered to me most was his happiness. My heart would flutter when he shows his gratefulness and appreciation in his own way of loving. In short, I gave him everything without knowing that I was going to hurt myself in the end.
On the moment I felt lost, I asked, “Where should my love go? Who would love me?” Too much love has killed me.
But is love supposed to be that bad? Neri, a high school friend, blogged about when one is given an opportunity to love. She said that a person should cherish that feeling and give it all he’s got because he will never know if the love will last or not. What matters is the present. Not the past nor the future. It hurts a lot when a relationship ends in a snap, but we should believe that breakups happen FOR A REASON — that better things will come.
October 23, 2008
Mixed emotions (1 Comment)
So much has happened lately. I thought everything was going alright. I was slowly getting back on track with organizing my priorities and duties. Then something happened that I didn’t see happening — Mac breaking up with me. It happened during the weekend. It went by so fast that I still have a slight hang-over from it. Again, I have a slight hang-over from the event. Not with Mac, mind you. Some people do not get me at all. >_>
I still don’t have the heart to explain what happened. (Man, I haven’t even talked about the death of my dear pet Allie then this comes…) Later on, maybe I shall. After much argument with a certain person, I can say that wrong judgment comes when you let your heart choose over your brain. Like they say, you better know who to take care of — the person or people who care for you the most.
Thanks to Phoebe, Joiz, Carol, dementia, Janine, aqrn785, Maru, ROLAND, Doy, Arni, Jaja, Liza, and a bunch of other people who were there for me.
Oh well, PARTY MODE ON! *ROFLMAO*
September 19, 2008
DVD writer + K. Wasabi video and pic spam (0 Comments)
I notice there’s always something bad bound to happen at least once a week. After Allie’s death early this month, my DVD writer shattered a CD into a lot of pieces rendering it useless. ~_~ Of course it’s not as bad as Allie’s death. I only had no budget for it being that it happened so suddenly. I was planning on buying a memory card for the PSP even. ~_~
I inserted an OLD mp3 CD inside the DVD writer. I eventually got busy Plurking, so I have no idea how many minutes passed. Then I heard a bang that I thought was my battery charger since I was charging the digicam’s battery that night. I checked my plugged gadgets, the lights, and even the kitchen. I didn’t see anything wrong. Wanting to forget about it, I carried on to looking for mp3s to upload for the band. I opened my DVD writer and there I saw where the bang came from. The writer over-spun the CD. I read that it happens when there are cracks in the middle of the CD, too dirty, or it isn’t meant for fast DVD-roms. ~_~ I opened the DVD writer in hopes it will work fine as long as CD pieces were removed. I couldn’t remove all of them. The writer wouldn’t close anymore even, so it was goodbye. I got a new one the second day after the incident happened. I had to buy right away because you all know I download like mad. *lol* I now use a Samsung again. My old DVD writer was only with me for less than 2 years. WTF!? ~_~
I finally got copies of the videos and pictures of our Aug. 29 gig at One Luv. All thanks to Peli for being our cameraman.
The pictures are yet to be organized while the videos are already up in my Multiply and K. Wasabi’s Facebook page. Embedding them here too for those too lazy to check my Multiply nor their Facebook accounts. Even though it pains me to do so considering I’m conscious about my site’s xhtml validity. XD; (Read more…)
September 11, 2008
Overdue pics (0 Comments)
^_^V Because I’ve been either busy or lazy to upload.
During my b-day,
Sandrock Custom and Maru’s Pentax SLR ^_^
(Multiply album)
Mac and I at One Luv *lol*
(Multiply and FB albums)
Carol’s birthday celebration w/ K. Wasabi
at Yellow Cab
(Multiply and FB albums)
I should ask Peli to give me a copy of pics of the gig at One Luv. ^_^ Facebook albums, btw, are for friends only.
July 22, 2008
Weird dream, a day with Mac, and my umobile sim (0 Comments)
I have been having weird dreams lately. Like last night, I had a dream that I have girlfriend. A real HOT one. ^_^V She’s super sexy and wears short skirts or dresses. It seems she’s only in HS. We went to her school (she was still in a short dress that I even helped zip up). Then we went to a room with only one table with 2 chairs. O_o A person was there who talked to her. Since there was only one chair left being that the other person already used one, I let the girl sit on my lap. @_@ Then she drew me various cartoon-ish animals. I remember they were cute and that she drew them fast. She was very good. Then she left and changed clothes. She wore something like a PE uniform. Her hair was tied up and she wore glasses. Very different from when we went out. I felt disappointed not because I saw her like that, but that our “date” ended just like that. ^_^V So I left. I went back around afternoon, it seems, to look for her. I couldn’t find her. I left again. Along the way, I saw the faces of my former schoolmates back in HS. I guess I miss them. ^_^ When I went down the stairs, I asked the students if they saw the girl. They said a lot of things I hardly recall except for one — she’s a really famous artist. @_@ I was surprised because she’s famous yet I didn’t know. I went back that night, but the guards closed down the main building. Only the people taking night classes were allowed in. I made up some excuse of leaving my cellphone in there, so the guard permitted me in. I quickly went to the room where I remember leaving her. The hallway was very dark. I got scared and all the more when I heard footsteps. So I rushed back to the staircase. Then I heard something falling down the stairs. I only checked when I felt I was already at a safe distance. I found out that the footsteps came from the girl. She was going towards me, but I ran away. She got angry that she threw her art book at the stairs hitting someone in the process. -_- I felt real bad.
Then I woke up… Still feeling bad for the girl.
Not an extremely weird dream, but still in a sense having a gf hasn’t crossed my mind. I haven’t even read or seen anything that would suggest such. I think my sleep was longer than usual because of that. *lol* When I woke up, I checked Plurk and my email among other things and prepared to meet up with Mac… After some bad days with him. ~_~ We first went to Ace Hardware at SM Makati to have 2 halogen bulbs replaced. After that, we headed to Hidalgo. I had my Golden Half with me, so I took pictures on our way. I took some shots at the ever busy Libertad, a shot of the moving train and some at Hidalgo when we arrived. We bought some films first. I wanted to buy 5 Solid Gold and 5 Lucky Color films, but the cheap supplier of Lucky Color films is gone! BOO~ XP So I ended up buying just 5 more Solid Gold films. :/ Meh~ I wanted Solaris, but I can’t find that there… Even in Pentax stores in SM. -_- Anyway, it rained minutes later. I wanted to take more pictures that I even bought batteries for the flash. WTF!? We decided to go home. It only stopped raining as soon as we reached the train station. Another WTF. >_>
Last week, I got my umobile sim! I was looking forward to its somewhat boastful features like the cheap mobile internet. When I tried it, talk about SLOW! I also kept getting errors. XP So far, joiz is my only contact in it aside from the emergency numbers. *lol* Anyone who wants to try it, let me know so I can send you an invite. I have 9 left. It’s free anyway & the sim will be delivered to you. Well, mine was delivered so it should be for the others too.
For those who have used or are using the sim, any thoughts on it? :/
July 16, 2008
Greenade & Pizza Hut camera photos (0 Comments)
I wasn’t feeling too lazy to organize my processed and scanned photos. Uploaded photos from 2 film rolls in my Multiply. I’ll be uploading in Facebook should I feel like it. *lol*
I bought a 35mm adapter for Greenade at about 60% off its original selling price.
I think I was able to take 28 pictures. Never bothered to count how many clicks I should do after every shot. Almost all the pictures have light leaks. I took pictures on very bright days and I never bothered to take up the back of the camera. Well, we all learn from mistakes. The film I used, btw, is a Solid Gold 200.
Our small & humble grotto on the rooftop
Mac wasn’t looking at the viewfinder, it seems
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June 12, 2008
Shoes, yesterday, and some yaoi reads (0 Comments)
aqrn785, I can’t seem to access your blog.
I want this shoes. That’s going to be in my to-buy list. *_*
I went to my bf’s place yesterday. I showed him the Lameboy emulator I just copied to my DS Lite this morning. He wanted to play old GB/GBC Pokemon games. XD I also showed him DSOrganize which is teh awesome. Let’s see if it will really help me be more organized. HAHAHHAHA~ WTF… I have the Belle de Jour planner, the Starbucks journal (but I actually use that more for literally journaling), and a Nokia 9300i… Still, I feel so disorganized! XDDD I gotta stop procrastinating.
Anyway, moving on… I stayed there until, uhh, 8:30PM. We just smoked and hanged out with his friends. I even saw the person I didn’t want to see. ~_~ I dislike her a lot because I find her, hmm, a disgrace to the female population. *lol* I know I have no right to say that. It’s just that, if she has the guts to run away from home, she must be able to take care of herself instead of becoming a freeloader. *shakes head*
Any of my friends on Plurk yet? XD It’s highly addicting. It has become the next IRC. *ROFL*
Miyamoto Kano’s Not/Love is sweet. ^_^ It’s been (another) long while again since I read yaoi. It was actually Tenshi wo Kudasai by Minamino Mashiro that I read before Not/Love. I can’t get past the 3rd chapter. The story’s just so confusing. ~_~
